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[size=14pt]3.3 Problems involved in sentences[size=12pt] Most students in China may write wordy sentences. They usually use the method of one-word-for-one-word translations. Their sentences contain many unnecessary words. Like the following EVE ISKselected from students:[/size][size=12pt](1) [/size][size=12pt]It was blue in color.[/size][size=12pt]It was small in size.[/size][size=12pt]Vicky is a quiet and careful girl.[/size][size=12pt]He returned in the early part of the month of August.[/size][size=12pt](2) [/size][size=12pt]The old engineer in collaboration with some or her younger colleagues jage of Conan gold[/url]ointly designed this machine.[/size][size=12pt]The above sentences could be called Chinese-English that refers to speech or writing in English that fly for fun goldshows the interference or influence of Chinese[/size][size=12pt] thinking[/size][size=12pt] patterns[/size][size=12pt]. Some sentences may be word for word translations of Chinese expressions. Chinese English may be age of Conan goldgrammatically correct, but the choice of phrases and the manner of expression do not conform to normal English usage, though understanding may not be a problem, it is absurd to English people. If the idea is fully expressed, the fewer words are used, the better. Wordiness only obscures, instead Shaiya goldof clarifying the idea. The sentence “it was blue in color” in which the phrase “in color” is unnecessary, as we know blue is a kind of color. The word “jointly” is equivalent to the phrase “in collaboration with”. Therefore, the sentences can be corrected in this way:[/size][size=12pt](1) It was blue.[/size][size=12pt] It was small. [/size][size=12pt] Vicky is quiet and careful.[/size][size=12pt] He returned in early August.[/size][size=12pt](2) This machine was designed by the old engineer in collaboration with some of his younger colleagues or revised this machine was jointly designed by the old engineer and some of his younger colleagues.[/size][size=12pt][/size][size=14pt]3.4 Problems involved in paragraphs[/size][/size][size=12pt] Illogical or reversing of the topic sentence or no topic sentence always can be seen in the students’ writing. Take a look at the following paragraph selected from English writing for TEM-4:[/size][size=12pt]They never get up before 9 o’clock to have their breakfast. In the morning, most of themwill stay in the washroom to wash their clothes. After lunch, if weather permits, they go for an outing with their classmates; or they spend a whole afternoon in the library, reviewing lessons or reading recent periodicals. They all get together in the dormitory in the evening, singing and chattering until they feel tired. University students always have a good relaxation on Sundays.[size=12pt][1][/size][/size][size=12pt]Having a glance at the above paragraph, you would say it has no errors, but closer check it, you will find something goes wrong. The above paragraph is a typical Chinese writing, because they often put the topic sentence at the beginning of the paragraph in English writing. Therefore, we should put the last sentence twelve sky goldat the beginning of the paragraph which makes it much more conform to the English writing form. [/size][size=9pt][1][/size]祝良. Composition and Note Writing in TEM-4[M]. 上海: 上海世界图书出版公司, 2005. 88.
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